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Acceptance - an Introductory Exercise

           If you have not read about acceptance as a means of stress reduction and mind detoxification, please  click here to read  in health section before continuing to read this section.

The purpose of this mental exercise:  We might often wonder why most of us are not successful in expressing our talents.  As Mata Amritanada Mayi Devi, said "The greatest tragedy in life is not death, but dying without realizing our talents is the tragedy of life".

What prevents us from realizing our talents?. Why is that we do not achieve what we desire?. Why I am not happy like others?. These are the questions that many of us ask ourselves. We often justify that others or situations in life are the cause for our failures and unhappiness. Here is one simple but most powerful exercise that alone will help you  not only success but also  happiness and content in life. This exercise might sound contradictory and seems difficult to practice that you have done like learning swimming or driving a car. But the more you practice, the better you feel and offers endless opportunity  to realize our potential. 

This magical exercise is Acceptance. Acceptance is about letting go of unrealistic expectations, large and small.  It’s about coming to terms with reality no matter how unfair or unpleasant it may be.  Acceptance is what we do when we acknowledge that no matter how hard we try, we can’t control everything, people or situations in life.

However acceptance does not means accepting failure and to give up trying or a do not care attitude. Here we are doing this mental exercise  to free our mind from stress of brooding over a fact or event that is unpleasant for us.

How can acceptance be practiced?

We react internally and externally to an unpleasant  situation or to an unacceptable person's behavior. There are two means of reacting to such situations. One is emotionally and the other way is with intelligence. Emotions work on the basis of one fact, our likes and our dislikes.

When we says some one is "Emotional" it means he is reacting based on his or her likes and dislikes. Emotions are not wrong. Emotions are needed to express the degree of our feelings. We express through our emotions only the degree of our pain and based on that A doctor decides the dosage of the pain medication.  So there is nothing wrong expressing emotions. What is hurting is the strong likes and dislikes we express which may not be in reality correct.

Intelligence is the fact giver or the reality projector. Intelligence throws light on the true nature of things. The true nature of things whether likeable or dislikable for us is the fact or reality of it.  Understanding the "Reality" of a person or the nature of the situation is Intelligence. 

Expressing our emotions to the reality of the facts is the correct approach  as taught by Krishna to Arjuna in Gita. When Arjuna hesitated to fight the war based on his likes and dislikes, Krishna taught him to react to the situation based on Intelligence. This is the essence of Gita.

There is nothing wrong in expressing our emotions, but you as the subject should express it with understanding of the true nature of the  object. This will leave the subject less agitated through the process of reaction and also after the reaction process.

If we react with emotion based on our strong like and dislikes, we waste time and energy brooding and complaining over it and inturn causing stress to ourselves.

Process: Acceptance means instead of reacting emotionally (that it displeases us) react with intelligence. That is first accept the reality of the fact is that  the event is happening in front of me or to me or against me. It is not agreeable to me or unpleasant to me. Instead of reacting out my un-acceptance (dislike), I think what is the best to do to handle the current condition and also think the ways to avoid that in future. Most importantly how can I transform myself to think more intelligently. This Self-Transforming attitude strengths not only Intelligence but also Awareness.

Acceptance does not mean that you accept the situation or the person's bad behavior is correct. Acceptance is for your mind only to accept the reality of the event and the person. Changing the event and person is only secondary possibility of the future. The person may change or may not. The situation may change or may not,. Both are not in your control.  You understand the Truth that at  present moment change can happen only to you.  This is acceptance. This relieves your mind from the Person's  behavior and also the unpleasant  nature of the situation.

Examples - 1:  If you are in a traffic jam, accept the situation instead of boiling yourself with the thought why this is happening. We cannot do anything about it. IAccept the  reality that you cant do anything about it.  Instead of disliking the event, think what is the best to overcome the consequence of being late by traffic jam and also how to prevent getting into this situations in future.

Example-2 - : If a person behaves in a rude manner, accept the person as he or she is. Accept the truth that you are facing the reality of the person whether you like it or not. Understand that you cannot change the person just by showing your disliking, but see how you can change yourself to avoid unpleasant reactions in your mind. Most importantly  analyze what makes the person to behave in that manner. You "be" the person and understand  how you will react  to such a situation. What is not acceptable to you naturally will be not acceptable to the other person.

     This understanding of another person as oneself is Compassion.    By this approach you bring slow transformation in the other person also. But change should begin from you and cannot expect the change from the other person. Without your inner transformation you cannot expect a change in another person. This non-acceptance is the reason for fight and war.  With this acceptance and inner transformation make the the other person also understand how his or her behavior is inappropriate. This will take time. 

Do not judge that the other person will not change. Give chances for the other person to change. This creates the quality of patience in you. Reflect upon yourself how much time you take to change an inappropriate behavior in yourself. Show that same compassion to others. This will blossom into unconditional Love.

Why do not we think or use our intelligence?. Because we rarely accept the reality of the person or situation. We only agitate our mind constantly thinking that this should not have happened or the person should not have behaved in such a way. This constant thinking of our dis-pleasure is the key point to be avoided. that cud-chewing mind is what gives us stress and agitation. You can let go of the cud-chewing (brooding over the incident again and again for years) only if you develop the acceptance attitude. This indirectly gives way for forgiveness a stress-curing medicine. Acceptance is the first step towards forgiveness. You cannot forgive a person or a situation with acceptance. Forgiveness is for your own benefit, to free your mind from the cud-chewing activity of the mind.  Ego grows through the cud-chewing activity of the mind.

Ego and acceptance

      Ego cannot accept a person (behavior attitude) or a situations or events in life. Non-acceptance is Ego's nature and also a means through which it gets its food to gain strength. The moment we accept any person or situation we see that the Ego's energy is drained. As soon as we accept a person or situation,  we find that the Ego loses it's heroic acts in our life's drama. Ego does not allow us to accept anything. It always blames others for all the problems. By blaming others,  Ego  has bright chances to get hold of the mind to either brood over the past or be anxious of the past. Acceptance brings out awareness to the present moment, while Ego does want to graze on past memories or worry and fear about future.

Purpose of the practice

  The intention of the acceptance practice is to confront our Ego. We take it for granted that we are this mind and Ego without  being aware of our true Self. This practice would allow us to be pay more attention (awareness) to our Ego. As soon as we accept someone or an event or action, the Ego would storm in us. Be aware the Ego would smell danger and would hide out for a while then it will strike us back with full vigor.

Goal of Sakthi Gita is for a happy life:  Understand non-acceptance of people (as they are) and events (as it is) is how Ego works in us. By condemning people and events, your Ego grows without your knowledge like a weed in your backyard garden. These thoughts rob of the nutrition that fertilize your strengths. You notice it only when it grows big and destroying your good plants.  Same way your Ego thoughts kills your creativity thoughts, your talents, your power, your health, your strengths. These are the nice plants you want to grow in your garden. Aim of life is to harness your potential and be happy in life. remove the weeds of Ego from your garden of life and enjoy the fruits of life. This is the ultimate goal of this Sakthi Gita.

What to witness

This exercise is just to be aware of our Ego. Only if we are aware of our enemy's strength and weakness we can win a war. So start to practice acceptance and immediately pay attention to the way our Ego acts. We might have a dispute or disagreement  with our partner, family member or with some at work or a shopping mall. Immediately chant the mantra "Accept".   We can witness the war movie unfolding in our minds.

Acceptance the most powerful spiritual technique

       Acceptance is the key to open the spiritual mastering of our mind. Practicing this brings amazing results. It is simple but very powerful in opening doors to the mystery of our mind and Self. This is the easiest means to purify the mind. It brings peace, patience and wisdom in us. It opens the doors of our inner light.  With this one practice all good qualities will get into our personality.

      There is an  amusing story about a scientist (Isaac Newton?)  He was a great cat lover and every time the cat needed to got out it would come to him and do "Meow! Meow! Meow!". The cat's behavior did not bother him until the cat gave birth to four kittens when the frequency of going out and in became more. So Newton called for a carpenter to cut  one big hole and four smaller holes in the  door so that the big cat would go in the big hole and the kittens in the smaller holes. The surprised carpenter asked whether he was talking to a world renowned scientist who  could not realize a simple fact that the kittens could have easily used their mother’s ‘pet door’.

      Acceptance is like a pet door through which all good qualities would get into us. So far with acceptance you understand that you get less stress, develop compassion, patience, forgiveness and unconditional Love. Last but the least, you become more aware of your Ego, transcend it and realize your own true nature, Consciousness.

"Expectations will become a problem only when one does not expect more than one outcome". - Uni5 Sakthi Foundation

The reverse is also True. How can one get an expected result?.

Answer is, take all the possible outcomes into consideration. But there are infinite possibilities and probabilities of multi-dimensions. How can take into all ? Answer is All the multi dimensions are reduced into Five and 10 dimensional view by Kapilacharya. The below quotes was the answer when somebody asked why Sankya is the highest and why you are using it in the name of Uni5?

What is to be done to get the highest probability of an desired outcome - Uni5 Sakthi Foundation.   

Multidimensional view of Bharath Astrology, Ayurveda, Spirituality and all Vedic Sciences.the greatest contribution of Bharath to the world. It is all about multi-dimension reduction in its simplest state to understand and apply it for making our life desires fulfilled and lead a happy life.

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Gita  Chapter -1

Arjuna Vishada Yoga

This is the chapter describing Arjuna's sorrow. First we will see what happens in the first day of the Mahabharata war. Equally we will discuss the symbolism of Mahabharat or Mahabharatham.

Essence of the chapter - 1.

         The two armies of Pandavas and kav-ravas met in the battle field. Arjuna asked Krishna to stop the chariot between the armies so that he could take a close look at the warriors with whom he had to contend. When Krishna placed the chariot between the two armies, Arjuna  saw his grandfathers, uncles, teachers, brothers, sons, dear friends and relatives in the enemy's side.  He was suddenly overcome with grief and deep sorrow filled his heart. He took his head in his hands while the body shivered with anguish and so left the weapons slip out of his hands.  Tears filled his eyes and so sat down on the chariot.

        He said to Krishna, "Looking at the honoured elders and teachers of mine, who are eager for battle against us. I am being weakened in my heart of what use will be any kingdom or wealth obtained by killing them? What enjoyment can one find in the kingdom of the world, which is smeared with the blood of one’s close relatives, sons, friend, teachers etc? I would rather be killed by the sons of Dhritarastra than laying my hands on them. I do not want to fight. It is a great sin to kill my teachers and relatives. If I kill them, family traditions will perish.  The slayer of the families will go to hell .  Arjuna was overwhelmed with grief. He threw away his bow and arrows and sank down on the seat of the chariot.

First day of Mahabharata war

        The two paternal cousin brother familes (Pandavas and Kav-ravas) with their allies stood in the battle field in Kururshetra to fight.  When Arjuna took a glance at the enemy, he saw his own relatives and became emotionally disturbed. Arjuna expressed his grief to Krishna  who was  his own maternal cousin, brother-in-law, friend as well his charioteer. Arjuna was reluctant to fight his relatives even though they had caused immense trouble in his life. Krishna cleared Arjuna's doubts and dilemma and made him to fight the war. What he spoke is what we now read as Bhagavad Gita.

           Before the two armies signaled for attacking each other,  an interesting incident happened. Yudhistra ,the eldest Pandava announced that whomsoever want to change sides of the armies can do it right then. Surprisingly, Yuyutsu,  one of the 100 sons in the kav-ravas left his side and joined the Pandavas. Duryodhana was furious with his younger brother Yuyutsu and screamed at him as a coward and a betrayer. Then began the war.

Please click here to continue to exercise on chapter-1.  

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Gita  Chapter -2

Sankhya Yoga (Analysis by dissecting)

        Sankhya means numbers or components or to analyze. When we encounter a problem we should dissect and know the components to resolve the problem. This Sankhya approach is used by Krishna to help Arjuna to understand his problem and so this chapter is known as Sankhya Yoga.

      In the first chapter Krishna listened to Arjuna's and only in chapter two Krishna talks and gives the essence of  Gita and the reality of life.  He tells Arjuna to accept the reality and the reality is that he is a king who duty is to fight war not out of greed of conquering but the duty  of fighting injustice.

Essence of Chpater-2

        Krishna told Arjuna that he is ignorant of the "Truth" about the real nature of all beings. Anything that is "Satyam" or Truth is not depended on any other thing for its existence.

        For example we do not attribute a shadow to be real, because the shadow does not have independent existence. It depends on an object and light for it to exists. In that case the light source or object is real and not the shadow.

       Similarly, Krishna says the physical body  is not real, because it does not have independent existence. Without the mind we do not feel the body. (Please think about this and enquire yourself and understand how far this fact is true). In sleep the Mind is not there and so we are not aware of the body.

      The next question, is this mind independent or does it depend on something else for its existence? We find that the mind depends on "Awareness" or "conditioned Consciousness". In deep sleep, we are not aware of our body, mind and our intelligence. This does not mean we are dead. There is something alive and that aliveness principle is known as Awareness. This awareness is also present in the day time when we are awake. But we are not aware of the awareness because the body and mind awareness dominate it. We can know this Awareness while we are awake only through Meditation.

Meditation is a means to be aware of the Awareness while functions all the time when we are awake or sleeping. But there is another subtler aspect called Consciousness which is present even when we are living in a body or not. This is Consciousness.  (Please click to read the  details of  Awareness and Consciousness in detail). 

    Krishna says everything in this Universe,  from the smallest particle to the gigantic star does not exist independently or in other words depends on something gross or subtle for its existence.  Since they cannot exist independently they cannot be called Real or Truth (click Creation link for details).

     Krishna says but there is only one "Reality"  or "Truth" on which all the forms in the universe depend for its existence. This reality is known as the "Un-Conditioned Consciousness" or Brahman in Sanskrit. This Un-Conditioned Consciousness is independent and does not depend on anything else for its existence.

       This imperishable, un-manifested, unthinkable and unchangeable aspect, the "Un-Conditioned-Consciousness" ("Brahman")  is never subjected to birth and death.  It is unborn, eternal, changeless and inexhaustible. It is not killed when the body is killed. Krishna says that this Aspect or Brahman slays not, nor is it slain. Weapons cut It not, fire burns It not, water wets It not, wind dries It not. 

Arjuna asked "What is this "Aspect of Un-Conditional Consciousness" or "Brahman" you are talking about Krishna,  which I cannot perceive?. How can I know whatever you are talking is true? How do I know about this imperishable, un-manifested, unthinkable and unchangeable "Brahman" or Un-Conditional Consciousness?

      Krishna answered to Arjuna that to know that your true Self is not this dying body but that imperishable, un-manifested, unthinkable and unchangeable "Brahman",   then you have to transcend the Ego which thinks itself as a perishable, thinking, changing object which is subjected to birth and death in this world.

     Arjuna curiously asked  what is the Ego that you are talking about and  how is it possible to transcend the Ego to know the imperishable, un-manifested, unthinkable and unchangeable "Brahman".

Arjuna's question is also each one of our questions too. Knowing the Ego and the eternal Brahman or Un-conditional-Consciousness will only free us from suffering in our life.

Just knowing Ego and transcending it, will establish us in Eternal Brahman? 

When the individual transcends from the objective experience of Body, Mind, and Intelligence, it unites (Yoga) with Consciousness. In Self Awareness state, one is aware of the limitations (ups and downs) of Energy levels in "Time" (Kaala Chakra, the period of multiple life and death cyclic processes).

Without Self-Awareness, that is not aware of Energy levels dictate luck energy (prosperity), one develops Kama, kridha Moha, Lobha, Matha, Matsarya. These become seeds in the Jeevatma itself (Self-Awareness) and leads to again life after birth. 

Doing actions in Self-Awareness state however, leads to Yoga or union with divine (undivided) Consciousness.  In this state of being which is absolute, full (no individuality), and unattached to anything to the relative field, is also free from the influence of actions. Thus by acting in this state, the mind becomes strong and actions and will be successful and brings eternal freedom to the doer.

With this technique of performing an action (Self Awareness), the action process is effortless, leaving the doer to enjoy immediately the fruits of action (good results) without being bound by its influence. This is because that fruits of action do not leave an impression in the mind deep enough to form the seed of future action.  In short, the doer established in self is unattached to the field of activity.

The doer loses individuality in the process of transcending (Ego) to the State of Being and elevates the doer above the influence of right and wrong or loss and gain, because in Brahman state (Consciosuness) there is only absoluteness and no relativeness.

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Working on Addictions / Habits

Exercise for second chapter of  Gita 

 This is will be one of the most challenging exercise for you to do. But it is Fun.

Second day of war
On the second day, once again the battle drums conches and trumpets were sounded. Second day war was more ferocious and cruel. Dur-yodhan had appointed Bhishma, the great grandfather of both the Pandavas and Kavravas. Bhisma caused heavy damage to the Pandava army.  Seeing this Arjuna asked Krishna to take him to Bhishma. Arjuna faced Bhishma and a very terrible fight ensued. All other soldiers stopped fighting to watch the spectacle. Arjuna was able to check Bhishma to some extent but he was still hesitating to kill his loving great grandfather in-spite of Krishna teaching Gita.

Exercise-2 for  second chapter.

This is going to be a great exercise. We understood from Krishna's teaching that only by transcending Ego we will know that we are not this body with petty desires, longings, mine-ness, attachment and fear. all this occurs because we think we are this Ego, mind, body, intellectual complex. Now as Arjuna asked Krishna our question is how to transcend this Ego. The beautiful answer lies from the events of the second day war. Dur-yodhan (Ego)  knew that Arjuna would be emotional in killing his beloved great grand-father Bhisma. Therefore Dur-Yodhan employed Bhisma to lead his army and so every time when  Arjuna encountered his grand-dad becomes emotional and loses interest to fight.

      Now it  is very important to understand that Bhisma  has a boon that he will not be killed and will die only when he wishes for death.   Isn't it interesting to note that our "habit's or addiction" is like this great-grand-father Bhisma?. No matter what others tell or advice, unless we ourself sincerely wish can we see the death of our habits and addictions? We all have like this one or more Bhisma's in us. Like Arjuna we become  emotional and hesitate to fight our habits and addictions when it comes to the point of fighting or confronting with our habits and addictions.

     Like Dur-yodhan our Ego employs habits and addictions to dance to its tunes. Like Bhisma in Mahabharat  we would be grumbling about our habits and addictions but cannot abandon it simply because of the controlling power of our Ego. To weaken the power of Ego, we must first overcome the chief commander of the army - Bhisma. Dur-yodhan (Ego) is the main enemy but it cannot be destroyed in one shot because it employs all others in the battle field like Duryodhan in Mahabharat war. He is killed only on the 18th day and till then Arjuna has to fight with his beloved relatives. Similar is our plight of fighting our Ego and in the process we have to kill many of our beloved habits and addictions.

    This is the sole reason of many spiritual practices advocating denial or giving up of of our habits. To mention a few are giving up smoking, alcohol, sweets, long hours of sleep,  taking up practices of fasting, silence etc are all oriented to fight the Ego indirectly. We cannot confront immediately our Ego but can only march forward step by step.

     So our exercise for the second chapter is this step of giving up of our habits or addictions. Find out one of your long lasting habit or addiction and work on it. The criteria for choosing one habit should be meet the following conditions.

1. Should be of long period and deep rooted.

2. Should be something that you want to give up and find it difficult  to give up.

3.You would feel miserable, emotional in giving it up.

             Arjuna was fondled by his great grand father when he was young. Among all the 105 grand children Arjuna was Bhisma's darling. Bhisma always gave Arjuna extra share of sweets and would tell bedtime stories. So Arjuna could not kill this loving Grandfather in the war. But krishna warns Arjuna that unless Bhisma is killed Dur-Yodhan cannot bedefeated.

      It is certain that you all would grumble about giving up your great grandfather Bhisma ( Habits and addictions) , but understand  without that you cannot win your Mahabharata war going inside you. Understand clearly that giving up the habit and making you miserable is not the point here, but using this we will be able to confront our Ego and finally transcend it and know our real nature of peace.